LABOR OF LOVE – Celebrating My 600th Post

Have you heard about the new twelve-step program for the habitually long-winded? Yeah, On-And-On...Anon.

Well, sometimes it feels like that's what I've been doing here at One Man's Wonder these past few years. I hope I've been picking my battles and choosing my words well enough so you don't agree.

FROM DUTY TO DEVOTION
It seems like just yesterday that I first stuck my toe into this blogging ocean. My first post, So This Ant Walks Into a Bar, got one comment.

At that time, I was grateful just for the support of my family and a few of my closest friends who—despite their shyness about leaving comments—dutifully came to see what Jeff's new diversion was all about.

    Six hundred posts, some 1,700,000 page views and 78 countries later, 
    I'm feeling pretty encouraged. I think I'll stick with it!

And speaking of encouragement, that, besides the sheer joy I find in the writing, is really what's kept me going—from those requisite visits of loved ones, to the small leaps of faith made by my followers, to all the "lurkers" who tell me they follow me anonymously, to the cherished relationships I've formed with fellow bloggers, authors and other kindred spirits. This online community is amazingly generous and kind-spirited.

Thank you, everyone! I'll make you a deal: You keep checking in at One Man's Wonder, leave me a comment when the spirit moves you, and share your favorite posts with others; I redouble my efforts to keep posting reflections and inspiration worthy of your interest.  Deal?

HOME DELIVERANCE – Presence From Afar

"Conjure" is a fascinating verb. Usually, it means calling upon some kind of spirit 
to appear, as if by magic. But it can also have a far less occult meaning.

That’s the kind of conjuring I do when I pray for my loved ones. Now, just so I don’t lose you in a fog of abstraction, I'm okay if we just call it visualizing, im-
agining, calling to mind…whatever.  

THE POWER OF PRESENCE
I believe there’s immense power in one’s physical presence. It’s what drew me to become a hospice volunteer. I knew I couldn’t reverse anyone’s terminal diagnosis; I didn’t presume I could end anyone’s pain.

But I did believe I could simply sit with someone. Keep them company. Help them find meaning, or at least a degree of comfort, in their precious days. If they could still communicate, I knew I could listen. Even if they couldn’t, I could still relate by sharing my thoughts, empathiz-
ing, caring. Language wouldn’t be essential.

The power of presence isn’t just some airy, theoretical notion. There’s scientific proof that the company of a caring person promotes health, healing, and a sense of connection.*

 It feels like I’m delivering the intention in person.

TELEPRESENCE
It’s one thing to be fully present with someone who’s right next to you. Where you can see, hear and feel each other. But how does one bring that kind of immediacy to bear on someone who’s 1,200 miles away? That’s what I aim to do when I pray. 

The trick, if you want to call it that, is that I don’t simply ask God ** to be present with my loved ones; instead, I will myself—with God’s help—to be present with each of them in turn. (I believe God is happy to employ me as a deputy.) 

ILLUSTRATION: dreamstime

There’s nothing all that inscrutable about it. I simply imagine the person’s face, and let that image meld with other memory to evoke what it’s like being with them. Their demeanor, their attitude, the spirit they exude. 

Then, once that virtual connection’s established, I use it as a conduit to send them my love and best wishes. It feels way more direct than simply putting a wish out there to the Universe and hoping it finds its way to a loved one. This way, it feels like I’m delivering the intention in person.

       The good news is that it might just work.

LOST AND FOUND
After doing this for a while I wondered, if I can project my virtual presence to someone I know, why couldn’t I do so to a stranger? Thus began my spiritual reaching out to folks who need the power of human presence more than anyone: 
those lost in the woods or at sea, buried deep inside collapsed mines, or trapped under earthquake or bomb-strike rubble.

IMAGE: Soldier of Fortune

In this case, my intention, my prayer, is for that poor soul to actually feel not just the presence of whatever their higher power, but my presence. To know, without doubt, that, even in their hopelessness, there’s this one fellow human being who, despite the untold miles, is thinking of them at that very moment, wishing them well, encouraging them not to give up. 

If my “friends and family” conjuring raises a few eyebrows, I imagine this audacious version might seem quite over the top. The good news is that it might just work. The other good news is that I doubt anyone can prove that it doesn't.

PHOTO: 9News, Sydney

   
         Sometimes you have to believe it to see it.

LEAP OF FAITH  
Of course, as with any endeavor—especially one this intangible—faith is the linchpin. Sometimes, contrary to that old skeptic’s adage, you have to believe it to see it. ***

And I do believe it. You can too.

              “Your presence is a miracle.” ~ THICH NHAT HANH

* Psychology Today

** “God” is the term I use to identify my higher power. Yahweh, Jehovah, Creator, Allah, Great Spirit…any title will do. I believe they’re all names for the same thing.

*** The expression, “You have to believe it to see it,” is often attributed to former National Geographic photographer, DeWitt Jones.

IMMISCIBLE EVIDENCE – Wonders of the Air/Water Interface

Two elements: air and water. At first glance, they seem about as different as they could be. They’re entirely different states of matter, after all. Even so, consider the surprising number of similarities:

     • They’re both classical elements—those believed by ancient Greek, Indian and 
        other cultures to constitute all matter in the universe.

PHOTO: CK-12.org

     • Neither has a fixed shape.
     • Both flow.
     • Both are subject to gravity.* 
     • Each is rendered visible just by the stuff 
        it carries, and by certain kinds of light.
     • Both are vital for life.
     • Each infuses the other.** 
     • Both suffocate denizens of the other.
     • Both refract light.***
     • Both acquire new properties when heat-
        ed or cooled—including changing state.****
     • Each, unless contained, spreads to fill whatever space gravity compels it to.
     • Both are harmed by abuse from the only creature capable of destroying them.   
          The fascination comes down 
          to part science, part magic.

So…if water and air are so similar, why is the interface between them—think the surfaces of lakes, streams or oceans, of raindrops, of the glass of water on my desk—so complex, so fascinating?

A decent answer would require volumes. But, at least to this inexpert witness to wonder, it comes down to part science, part magic. 

ILLUSTRATION: ConceptVis.app

THE SCIENCE
The first and perhaps most obvious impact of this air/water junction is their interaction’s generation of weather and climate. You know, evaporation, conden-
sation, precipitation…and repeat. But there’s more 
than that going on.

Turns out the water cycle melds with a carbon cycle, which finds carbon dioxide at the water surface—defined as a one- to two-nanometer membrane—transforming into bicarbonate and carbonate ions. †

GRAPHIC: Journal of Physical Chemistry

Atmospheric scientists have also found that these ion-to-ion interactions become "stickier" near the air-water interface, resulting in proteins unfolding, aggregating, or assembling into significantly different structures. ††

The compendium of scientific findings continues with a list of mind-boggling processes like peptide synthesis, phosphorylation, oligomerization, colloid mobilization, protein unfolding or aggregation †††…I’ll spare you the rest.

     To unlock the mystical properties...it took 
     a ten-year-old with a cane fishing pole.

ILLUSTRATION: Norman Rockwell

THE MAGIC
It took lots of science and technology to discover those arcane properties. To unlock the mystical properties of the air-water interface, though, it 
took a ten-year-old with a cane fishing pole.

I’d throw an angleworm deep into the lake, this hidden, alien world, connected by a thin filament held between my fingers. Then I’d wait. If there was life down there in that cold, dark, liquid place, it eventually sent me a message through the fiber. 
If I was lucky I’d get to meet the sender. ‡

That cryptic contact seemed to me no less otherworldly than receiving a faint message from deep space.

PHOTO: Warner Brothers

     What other substance can…bathe an 
     infant’s head and carve the Grand Canyon?

ICEBERG IN MY COFFEE
As this insight might suggest, when it comes to air and water, I’m partial to water. For one thing, I spent nine months submerged in it just before I was a kid. 

For another, air seems almost too easy to take for granted—except, I suppose, when one’s flying…or suffocating. I mean which wakes you up faster, a cool breeze or a splash of cold H2O? 

I love the capricious relationship water has with other elements. With light, it can bend it like a prism, absorb it like a sponge or reflect it like a mirror. Percolating into soil, water provides the nectar of life for nearly 300,000 species of plants. 

ILLUSTRATION: FreePic

What other substance can both render a Winslow Homer masterpiece and torture a suspected terrorist? Transform itself into the exquisite intricacy of a snowflake and the Titanic mass of an iceberg? Bathe an infant’s head…and carve the Grand Canyon?

PHOTO: FreePic

While I realize the Law of Conservation of Matter holds for all the elements, I’m especially captivated by how it applies to water. For example, the possibility that a molecule of water melted from that iceberg that sank the Titanic might reside, for now, in the coffee I’m sipping.

THICK WATER
As with most of my musings here, digging up answers about the seam between water and air also uncovers more questions:

     • Is a splash caused by something falling into the water the obverse of that 
       caused by something like a fish jumping out? 
     • If water can vanish into thin air, could one say that air—also absorbable by 
       its counterpart vanishes into thick water?
     • Why does water as a mist cool us, while as humidity it makes us feel hotter?
     • When we refer to the surface of a lake, isn’t it just as true to call it the sur-
       face of the air above the lake?
     • Is the only difference between swimming and flying the speed at which you 
       can do it? 

IMAGE: Medium.com

When you let loose your child-like sense of wonder, what do you notice about air, water and their interaction? I and the couple of thousand people who stop by here every day would love to hear your thoughts! Just click on the “comments” link below.

* Because air has mass, it is attracted by Earth's gravity, which gives it weight and creates atmospheric pressure. Gravity keeps the atmosphere from drifting into space and pulls air towards the ground, making it denser at lower altitudes. 
Google AI Overview

** Air absorbs water vapor (humidity) from liquid water (evaporation), with warmer air holding much more, while water absorbs gases like oxygen from the air (dissolving), a process enhanced by surface area and turbulence, both crucial for the water cycle and aquatic life  –  Google AI

*** Air bends (refracts) light just as water does, though generally to a much lesser degree. Both media bend light due to changes in speed caused by density differences, a process called refraction. Air bends light significantly when there are sharp density changes, such as that of hot air above pavement (the cause of mirages). 

**** Air freezes solid, but only at –362 degrees Fahrenheit at standard atmospheric pressure. This, of course, is not possible in our planet’s natural conditions, but it’s commonly seen in scientific and industrial labs. – Google AI

† Jin Qian, Staff Scientist, Chemical Sciences Division, Berkeley Lab.

†† "The Promise and Intrigue of Where Water Meets Air" – Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, 
June 5, 2014

††† “Colloid mobilization and transport in groundwater”
Joseph N. Ryan and Menachen Elimelech – ScienceDirect.com

‡ Over the past few years, the wonder of communicating with fish has tarnished considerably as I’ve realized that those “cryptic” tugs and jumps, which since childhood have felt like fun, are no such thing for the fish. I now believe I have no right to enjoy the pain and terror of another of God’s creatures.

MARGARITA WALKS INTO A BAR...

I’ve written here a few times about one aspect or another of my favorite spirit, tequila: where it comes from, the different styles and grades of it, how it differs from its upstart cousin, mezcal, where to find the best margaritas in Zihuatanejo.

Speaking of, I like my margaritas—as I like my coffee and my women—strong. So blen- 
ded is a non-starter; if I wanted a lemon-lime slushie, that’s what I’d ask for.

Instead, what I say to our waiter—often to my wife’s eye-rolling dismay—is: Quisiera una margarita. Sin sal; rocas; como dos cubos de hielo, no más. That’s rocks, no salt, just a little ice, like two cubes.
          I like my margaritas—as I like my   
          coffee and my women—strong.

A GLASS HALF FULL

Most often, what arrives is a nice looking low-ball glass filled near the brim with what one hopes will be the real deal. Usually, though, it’s a glass packed with ice, the spaces between whose cubes are filled in with just enough liquid to make the glass appear full…of something. 

And here’s where the integrity part comes in. Not integrity of any bartender, waiter or proprietor. I’m pretty sure I know what’s going through at least one of their heads: If I don’t fill this guy’s glass, he’s going to think we’re stiffing him.

With drinks, they’re thinking, as with our food, we aim for a set portion, so I literally cannot give the dude what he asked for.

So, no, I get it. It’s not their integrity; it’s the integrity of the drink. My drink. All I want is to be able to taste all the ingredients in something approaching the proper proportions.

WATCH YOUR STEP
I suppose I could explain that I understand the portion thing, and that I don’t care if my order results in a glass that’s half full, as long as the drink has teeth. But, given that Sally thinks just my basic order sounds a bit fussy, this feels over the top.

Which leaves me with two options: I settle for a margarita that, especially in hot climates, the melting ice waters down in minutes. Or I look for the nearest planter where I stealthily flick all but one or two of the offending chunks. I prefer the latter…as do the plants.

                     

                The only thing worse than a bad 
                margarita: two-for-one.

EXTRA CREDIT
There are exceptions. Though, if they were common, I guess there’d be no basis for this post. Thus my celebration of them here. (And I make a point of celebrating them with at least the waiters, letting them know how much I appreciate un trago bien fuerte—a nice strong drink.)

Here are a few ways the happy scenario plays out:
  1) I get the “honest” margarita on the first try.

The Honest Margarita – at Zihuatanejo's lovely Terramare

   2) My first margarita’s a faux-full one, but someone notices me jettisoning my 
        ice, and my second one's perfect.
   3) (Rarest of all) The bartender’s having a good day and makes me a drink with 
        both poco hielo and a full glass. (This, of course, merits an extraordinary tip.)

¡SALUD!
So, to all you margarita—or any other drink—aficionados, here’s hoping your yen for a good, strong margarita doesn’t get watered down. May the tequila be decent, your ice cubes few and your cocktail at least as honest as your thirst.

SEASON'S GREETINGS!

I wish all my visitors and loyal followers from all over the world—more than 80 countries—the very best of this season. For us Christians, that means MERRY CHRISTMAS! (para mis hispanohablantes amigos, ¡FELIZ NAVIDAD!) For my Jewish friends, it's HAPPY HANUKKAH! For all of us here in the northern hemisphere, HAPPY WINTER SOLSTICE! 

Here's to longer, brighter days. To kinder, gentler care for each other and our precious planet. To noticing and celebrating small wonders!

Whatever your celebration, may these days be kind to you, your families and your loved ones. May they bring you new awareness, wonder and gratitude!

HOMELESS FOR THE HOLIDAYS – The Woe of Nowhere To Go

Last night, while driving home from my men's group, I noticed a young man standing alone in a bus shelter. It was the motion that caught my eye. Rocking back and forth, hugging himself in a flimsy, white blanket, his breath made clouds in the 20-degree air.  

I’m guessing he had nothing on under the blanket but pants, a shirt, maybe a very light jacket. The shelter was quite dark, so I don’t think the infrared heaters were working. 

AN ILL-FITTING GARMENT
I often wonder about strangers, especially when they’re alone—who they are, what they’re doing, what’s their story. But for some reason, in this fellow’s case the question that struck me was, Where are you going?

Are you on your way home? Going to see a friend? Off to your night shift? I probably shouldn’t read too much into such details, but somehow the blanket feels like a poignant answer to those questions. A garment less chosen than scrounged. 

PHOTO: Lily Fulop

What if, I asked myself, you’re homeless? What if all your family bridges have burned? What if the next bus provides the only shelter you’re going to find tonight? Do you even have the fare?

And, again, that insistent question: Where will you get off?

              How easily we take for granted 
              our destinations in life.

DESTINATION: SURVIVAL 
The young man drew just a passing glance, but he’s been on my mind ever since. It’s not just curiosity and compassion, but also sadness. For, even if my reckoning on his particular plight is misplaced, I know there are countless others tonight for whom it would not be.

How easily we take for granted our destinations in life. Appointments, a job, social occasions… Even if our engagement’s with no one but a favorite place, we’re very seldom without an aim in our comings and goings.

PHOTO: Kidstuff Counseling

But when the notion of belonging somewhere lies beyond reach, do you think a person’s idea of “destination” might change from one of place to one of time? How long can I stay on this warm bus? When will they kick me out? 

For some—like perhaps this young man—the aim is simply survival. Can I make it till morning?

        I’ve decided there must be some purpose, 
        some intent, in my having noticed him.

CAUSES, EFFECTS, REMEDIES  
I used the same excuses most of us would for not stopping and just asking the kid these questions, maybe helping him out. Instead, I weigh his fortunes from afar, from a world of warmth and belonging.

Nonetheless, I’ve decided, there must be some purpose, some intent, in my simply having noticed him. And, yes, in contemplating the causes, effects and remedies for homelessness and its attendant ills.

In 2024, it’s estimated that .23 percent of Americans—roughly 770,000 of us—
experienced homelessness.* 

To be honest, I don’t think I’ll be out anytime soon looking to engage, face to face, folks like this young man who look displaced. But I am moved to find and start supporting an organi- 
zation that provides effective, reliable “housing first” services and programs here in Minneapolis. 

Among those I’m considering: Avivo Village—which provides indoor communities of “tiny houses; People Serving People—focusing on keeping people in their existing homes; or the United Way—which engages citizens, businesses and organizations in combating homelessness. 

Just imagine how it might feel if, especially during this busy, destination-rich holiday season, you had nowhere to go, nowhere to be. I hope that, like me, you’re moved to help our fellow citizens—like my White-blanket Man—whose home might very well exist only in their dreams.

* National Alliance To End Homelessness 

OH DEER! – Harvest Or Holocaust?

I just read an article about this year’s white-tail deer-hunting “harvest” here in Minnesota. And it’s got me thinking. 

For years I’ve wondered whether hunting—or for that matter fishing, which I love—are even morally defensible for one who sees himself an evolving human being. But I’ll leave that concern for another time. For now, let’s just say I wonder if most people realize the astounding number of deer dying at human hands.

When I was a boy, I read—probably in either Boys Life or Ripley’s Believe It Or Not—that in Pennsylvania alone over 30,000 deer died that year just being hit by cars! That’s when I first became aware of the sheer number of deer that must live in our fields and forests in order for that mortality rate to not completely decimate the population. 

PHOTO: Maciej Bledowski / Adobe Stock

So this latest article renewed my fascination with cervine mortality. It’s led me to both revisit those roadkill stats and add to the mix deaths exacted by hunters. Here are some of the recent statistics: 

Here in Minnesota, the number of deer-vehicle-collisions in 2024—virtually all resulting in the animals’ deaths—was estimated at around 40,000.*

And the Minnesota hunting toll? Somewhere around 171,000.** In one year. In one state. And Minnesota is far from the deadliest place for deer. In Pennsylvania, the body count was an astounding 476,000.***

PHOTO: Deer + Deer Hunting

    Some 6,000,000 deer die annually at the hands 
    of hunters. That’s a venison Whopper of 
    nearly a billion pounds.

IMAGE: Shutterstock

FLESHING OUT THE STATS 
To grasp that number, imagine a sold-out crowd of Philadelphia Eagles fans packed into Lincoln Financial Field—around 70,000 people. Now, let's imagine swap-
ping out every one of those human beings for a white-tail doe or buck.

Now shoot and kill them. All of them.

Next, haul out and truck away all those carcasses and in-
vite 70,000 more deer to the stands. And kill them too.

PHOTO: KUAM News

Repeat this turnover six-and-a-half times. 

Or, let’s look at it another way: by weight. The average deer weights about 150 pounds. So that 2024 Pennsylvania hunting season delivered a bit over 71,000,000 pounds of venison, hide and bone. (This begs the question, doesn’t it: how much of that meat was actually consumed by the hunters?)

PHOTO: Peak to Plate

Again, this is just Pennsylvania. In the whole country some 6,000,000 deer die annually at the hands of hunters.**** That’s a venison Whopper of nearly a billion pounds.

For further perspective, consider that human murders in the U.S in 2024 (according to the FBI) totaled about 17,000. U.S. human deaths the same year from all causes: around 3,000,000. 

How we can cull such numbers of these beautiful woodland animals year after year and still see well over a hundred times as many of them in the U.S. as there were a century ago?***** (In fact, many now see deer as pests, an invasive species.)

There are several factors: wildlife management practices; adaptation to changing habitats and conditions; and the decline and/or relocation of the species' natural predators. I guess thinning the herd by 6,000,000 doesn't make much of a dent when that leaves 30,000,000 of them, all breeding faster than we can kill them.

       Ultimately, it comes down to us human 
       beings’ troubled membership in Earth’s 
       family of sentient beings. 

INFORMED BRUTALITY
For me, one takeaway from my research is to recall that admonition we always hear from our vegan friends—and others promoting thoughtful consumption—that we should all know the brutal facts about where our meat comes from.

PHOTO: USDA

(Believe it or not, one of the standard field trips for Linwood Park School, my elementary school, was a visit to the meat-packing plants of South St. Paul. There we did, indeed, witness the live animals conveyed into the abattoir and the carcasses conveyed out; the awful cacophony of machinery and the animals’ desperate bleating; gutters coursing with still-warm blood.)

Another much broader effect might be to ask ourselves if we take too much of life—especially non-human life—for granted. As a species arguably well on our way to destroying our precious planet, we persist in such hubris at our own peril.

Again, my point is not to impugn hunting, fishing or consuming animal protein. After all, many of us were compelled by our native environments to be carnivores. 

But we were also destined to evolve. 

So let's be thoughtful, my friends. Let us first appreciate the vastness of our planet, the sheer numbers of our fellow organisms—like deer—with whom we share it.

Let's learn to be more aware of our tenuous membership in Earth’s family of sentient beings. Understand the life-and-death consequences of everything we do. And recognize the manifest oneness of Creation.

PHOTO: Whitetail Deer

                                    
* University of Minnesota Center for Transportation Studies
** Minnesota Department of Natural Resources 
*** Pennsylvania Game Commission
**** National Deer Association